When you were married, you and your husband probably committed to loving one another through good times and bad. It sounds like the bad times are here. You say you love him --one of my favorite books describes love as patient and kind. Love never gives up; it keeps hoping and persevering. Stand by your man, girlfriend! Look at things from the other side -- if you were in his shoes, what would you want him to do?

I'm not saying that this will be easy. But nothing in life worth having ever is! You may want to find a support group in your community of spouses in a similar position. You're going to need a lot of emotional support to get through this time. Encourage your husband to continue to "get himself together."

Make it clear that you will no tolerate drug use and encourage him to seek counseling and a support group to end his habit. As always, do not place yourself in physical or emotional danger if he is or becomes abusive in the future.

As his wife, you have promised to support him. Your lives have become joined together -- "getting on with your life" should mean your life together. Otherwise you lied when you promised to love him for better OR worse.

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