Protect Each Other. Remember that you are moving out of your parent's households and creating your own. Even if you have lived away from your parent's home for many years, psychologically you may still need to cut the apron strings. You need to begin to value your spouse above your parents. If you and your mate have a disagreement, work it out between the two of you without involving your folks. Perhaps your wife-to-be wants white roses, but your mother thinks that pink ones would look nicer. Even if you agree with your mother, or don't have an opinion, you need to defend your wife.

Never talk bad about your mate to your parents, or his/her parents. This can only lead to later problems and doesn't build up your significant other like you should. Always speak positively about them and discuss problems with them in private.

Seek Common Ground. Look for agreement and compromise whenever possible. Seek to build relationships with your future in-laws founded on trust and communication, apart from "wedding talk." What are your future in-laws interests? Goals in life? Are you making the effort to really get to know them? Remember that your mate's family will become your family, too. While you may not always like them, you need to try to love them. Respect and kindness go a long way.

When you and your mate are presented as "husband and wife" for the first time, a new family will have been forged. You each bring a rich history into your new family. You will always be your parent's children and good relationships with your in-laws will help you to understand your spouse even better. It will also give you a "new set of parents." Whether they will be in-laws or "out-laws" is up to you. Building a good relationship with your in-laws begins now, in the wedding planning process!